How to win trust
Time, as an irreplaceable resource, should be spent competently. Actually, therefore, it is important to form confidential and intimate relationships with the child from an early age of the baby, without waiting for the onset of adult problems. Mutual respect is strengthened if you show your love daily, by each action and word demonstrating feelings.
Distrust, like disregard, gives rise to a dead-end model of relationships, because in such conditions there will be no respect. It is generally believed that the respect of children to the elders is unquestionable, but in reverse order it is rarely possible to see the same pattern. Do many parents pay attention and respect to the interests of the child, allow them to do what they love, wait patiently until the baby has finished what he started? When we, the parents, need the obedience of the child, we demand immediate attention and obedience, and when the child needs help or the participation of the mother and father, we often allow ourselves to reject and postpone the moment. Who came up with this pattern of behavior? This model is imposed by the society and breaking its strong fetters is not for everyone.
What can we do to ensure that relations with the child are strengthened and the years do not affect them negatively? How to stay in the comfort zone of the child and not prevent him from developing independently? Such questions worry parents trying to find a middle ground in the process of educating their heir and, in general, all sane people.
Low self-esteem and a deep sense of resentment are often the result of the cruel and selfish attitude of parents. To the child did not have to bear this burden throughout his life, it is necessary to control his behavior from the very beginning and try to put himself in the place of the baby. Adult negativity, accumulated for a day aggression, problems at work, financial troubles and many other mucks should not affect the relationship with children. As in relations with relatives, all the trouble should be left behind the door of the house, so as not to bear contention and trouble, like dung into the hut. Of course, all this is easy to discuss, but harder to perform. Therefore, in order to facilitate the stages of self-healing, we recommend that you follow the recommendations on a daily basis. To begin with, accustom yourself to a simple:
- thank the child for everything he does at your request;
- negotiate a deferment of execution, discussing the possible time (not all requests should be executed immediately);
- Speak your personal failures and voice your bad mood;
- do not hesitate to show your love and often hug, kiss the children.
These simple tips will help you learn to be interested in the affairs of kids and teens, will make you more sensitive to the mood of the child. You will begin to notice interests, inclinations and hobbies, will be more responsive.
An important feature of recognizing the child's emotions is also the ability to understand the situation from his point of view. Naturally, many people find it hard to imagine themselves at the age of five or to recall the everyday life of a twelve year old, but this does not mean that adults can not imagine what children live in the specified periods of life. Knowing the peculiarities of perception of the reality of your child, understanding the prerequisites of his mood, and most importantly, respecting his freedom of thinking, one can consider certain actions of children as if in a cut and understand for themselves much more than with a cursory, superficial view of the situation.
Стремитесь к общению с детьми и во время этих непродолжительных, но частых бесед, вы непременно узнаете о своих малютках то ценное, что поможет вам выстраивать самые доверительные и искренние отношения.